I first met Omar at the LA Feline Film Festival last year, and then again this summer at Meow Meet LA. He is a striking, unfurrgettable feline with cattitude and charisma to spare. Recently, we sat down for a cat-to-cat interview.
KATNISS: Omar, do you consider Sam and Briana to be your parents, your minions or something else?
OMAR: Sam and Briana are my primary meat providers and dedicated care takers. I require much maintenance, which they provide. Weekly baths, massages, and pawdicures. They also do a good job of chauffeuring me all around the world. I like to follow them closely because they have excellent meat acquisition powers wherever I go.
KATNISS: You live in L.A., land of movie stars and ageless beauty. Do you ever feel pressure to succumb to Botox for your um, wrinkles?
OMAR: I’ve been accused of having my brain on the outside. Does this make me look smarter? Luckily, for me the wrinkle factor only applies to the ladies. Like a Hollywood actor, the wrinkles give me a distinguished look. While this misogynistic mentality is unfortunate, it seems to be working in my favor.
OMAR: Vote OMAR 2016! There just isn’t enough representation for Americans like me. I’m a friendly tyrant you can trust, and I want all my future constituents to know that I wholly support a free meat for all platform. It is my belief that cats must be elevated to citizen status, and receive equal rights to supermarket meat counters like our biped counterparts. Give cats the right to vote and end feline suffrage. My first executive order will mandate cat-friendly doors on all refrigerators. Upon moving into the White House, I plan to add a two story carpeted cat tree and will replace the rose garden with exotic catnip from around the world.
KATNISS: What do you like to eat, besides meat? Spiders?
OMAR: I like to eat all things. I am never full, always hungry. I don’t see this as a problem, although my humans went so far as to install cat-proof locks on the kitchen cabinets. I have on occasion managed to bypass these with great reward. Generally, the humans provide me with an excellent selection of raw meat nuggets and raw bones to chew on. In order, I prefer chicken, duck, rabbit, lamb, turkey, and beef. Basically anything I can sink my sharp teeth into, sometimes I eat first and think later! For my 1st Birthday I had an epic meat cake that I voraciously took eight minutes to eat. It was so delicious, I even tried to eat the candle. There is a video clip of that on my Insta.
KATNISS: So many of the cats on Instagram wear bowties and other humiliating paraphernalia. I cannot imagine you would be caught dead in any of that stuff. At MeowMeetLA, I noticed you wearing a black sweater with a skull and crossbones on it. Please tell me about your style.
KATNISS: Who are your feline siblings and what are your relationships with them?
OMAR: I have a sister. Her name is Bezoar, she is orange, fuzzy, and comes from the streets of Baltimore. Our age difference is substantial. I am slowly winning her over. I like to touch her, though she does not like it when I touch her. It’s complicated.
KATNISS: You may be the Prince of Darkness, Overlord of the Underworld, but you still enjoy being carried around in a baby sling. Please explain.
OMAR: Being carried makes me feel warm, powerful, and secure. Make no mistake, I am always in control, steering my human from within the papoose. While I do walk around in public, I am aware that I am short in stature. So, this method of transportation is great for protection, and I can better relate to the humans. People take my authority more seriously when I am at eye level. Also, I am particular about which surfaces I like to walk upon, because I do not like dirt between my toes.
KATNISS: You are purrfectly comfortable out and about, meeting new people. Is this part of your plan for world domination?
OMAR: I have been out and about since I was a wee kitten. People must know who I am if I am to dominate them. I know that every time I don my harness there is bound to be an adventure, usually including free meat. I enjoy meeting new people to fawn over me and join my legion of followers. I’d like to tell you that it’s just about world domination, but the truth is, I’m also there for the bird watching.
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